Bad Romance

One thing that really kills any story is how romance is portrayed. The unfortunate tendency in stories, especially in our modern day, is to have two characters look shyly at each other for a while then fall head over heels in love, with no substance or depth to their romance. Here are some examples of overdone, horrible love stories.

- Eragon and Arya from "The Inheritance Cycle". The two are destined, in a not-so-subtle way, to fall in love forever. However, Eragon's "feelings" are nothing short of lust for this hot elf babe, and she is nothing more than the arrogant, cold-hearted woman, and yet he still wants her.

- Will and Lyra from "His Dark Materials". The two young teenagers are companions for two books, and then suddenly, one day, they decide to have a make out session in the woods. Afterwards, they then are madly in love and are terribly pained when they have to separate. For goodness' sake, they're only thirteen, fourteen!

- Various romances in the "Binding of the Blade". Even though they are not as painful as Eragon and Arya's, there is little substance or depth to these various relationships. Most of them are the "love at first sight" kind, and there is little real chemistry between the characters.

- Robbie and Celia from "Atonement". I hate to add this book to the list, as it is very well-written, but I did not like the romance. Basically, the rich girl and the servant boy ignore each other most of the time and then decide to have sex in the library, where they then proclaim their love and maintain it for the course of the book, even though they are pretty much apart and have little contact during that time.

- Various romances in Erin Hunter's "Warrior" series. These are bad because they are the typical stereotypes and become very repetitive and annoying, especially as the series progresses. You have the forbidden love aspect (which shows up at least three times in the series) where two characters are not supposed to be together but are anyway and then the two characters who don't like each other then end up as mates.

- Paul and Chani from "Dune". Even though I enjoy the series to an extent for their great detail and complex plots/ schemes, Paul and Chani's relationship was a bit weak for me. Basically, the two fifteen-year olds meet for the first time, Paul knowing that they are destined to be together, and a few days later they have sex, beginning a long relationship that lasts the rest of Chani's life. They never marry, though Paul technically does to another woman but he treats Chani as his real wife and ignores the other woman. My issue is that there was little reason for them to be together apart from destiny, which means there is little substance to their love.

- Arkady Renko and his ladies in the Martin Cruz Smith books. Renko has two relationships with two women in these two books, and neither of them are deep or even well-written. He is more or less bewitched by one girl and continues sleeping with her, even though she's revealed to be a slut. The other relationship is sudden and unrealistic, with Renko 'feeling alive' with this girl but there's no evidence of this or of the relationship except for her nearly hitting him with a book and one sex scene.

The best romances, I believe, are those with chemistry and depth. Let me explain. The characters have to be attracted to each other, but not out of their rank or physical appearance. And, there has to be a spark between them, real interaction. I can't really explain except that it's something you see between a couple, the way they act together, that tells you if their love is real. Looking at pictures of various engaged couples over the years, there are some who just have a light on their smiling faces and eyes where you can tell "oh, yeah, they're in love", rather than a smile that looks forced and unreal.

Here are some suggestions for writing good romances.

- Begin the relationship as a friendship. My dad once told me that that is how love starts, and I think this has been seriously forgotten nowadays.

- Avoid the use of destiny or fate. If you do want to use it, then have more substance to the relationship, more of a real spark and less of how they are destined to be together.

- Leave room for disagreements. Even the best couples don't agree on everything, and most romances are written from the perspective of two lovey- dovey people too in love to argue. It doesn't have to be disagreements that end in the couple being separated, but it does have to be more than arguing over what outfit to wear to the party or something of that nature.

- Show it. If you want to make your romance convincing, then it has to be more than saying "I love you" or just a shy glance. The guy may give the girl flowers or chocolates, and the girl also has to give something to him, like sewing him a new cloak or making him his favorite meal. Another example, which could be used in a fantasy, if the guy just came through a real hard battle, the girl will want to comfort him emotionally and be a strong shoulder for him, though this could be applied really to any genra of writing.

- And, finally, unless you're specifically writing a romance story, one idea may be to keep the love in the background and not in the forefront. Even though Tolkien wrote his romances sounding more like an epic myth, I did like how in the "Lord of the Rings" books Aragorn and Arwen are in love, but Aragorn, knowing what he has to do, focuses on the task at hand, not griping about how far apart they are and how he misses her.

These are just a few examples, but I urge aspiring writers not to ruin your stories with a bad, predictable romance. It has become a pitfall for many authors, so don't fall into it as well.